Hello, world!

It's been many years since I kept a blog, and I thought it might be a good way to connect with readers and build a loyal audience. As I get older, I find myself doing a lot of reflection but not a lot of talking or writing, and it seems like a waste of good ideas, although it has been a peaceful break from mining my own imagination for content. College was so much reading and writing that after four years I felt completely burnt out on literature. I didn't want anything at all to do with books, which are impossible to avoid as an English major because everyone insists on gifting us books for birthdays and Christmas!

I've written precious little and read maybe a handful of books since graduating five years ago, most of which were audiobooks. I have been busy weathering some tough life challenges and keeping my family afloat financially, which doesn't leave much time or energy for creative pursuits. Things are improving now that my oldest son is working full-time and helping with the household bills. I think I just needed some time to recharge my passion--a mental rest to create the space for inspiration to return. It has certainly come back in full force because I've been a busy bee these last few months!

I set out to produce a simple free ebook to soothe sad children. As I formatted the manuscript for print publishing, I ended up expanding and renaming the book. Now I unintentionally have two books (admittedly just two editions of the same book, an affordable basic version and a higher-priced premium version, but still) and three more planned by the end of the year: another self-help book for kids and inner children and two short fiction stories for children. I also have ten business nonfiction books planned for next year, and then I plan to write romance for a while, a new frontier for me.

Not that I'm crazy about business nonfiction. I just want to get into a position where writing pays the bills as soon as possible so that I can dedicate my efforts to my true passions, fiction and memoir, unfettered by financial woes. The nonfiction and romance genres offer the highest return on investment for my labor and seem like the fastest way to build a steady stream of income. My ultimate goal is to write novels, but I don't think I'm quite there yet skill-wise. All of this is just practice, really, gearing up to face the final boss. I've learned so much already about the self-publishing industry, book formatting, the ins and outs of royalties and rights, etc., but I know I still have a long journey ahead of me.

It's really helped my confidence just getting a finished product out there, finally, a printed book that people can physically own. This is my lifelong ambition, a moment I've dreamed of since I was a little girl falling in love with words through beautiful books like Stellaluna and The Rainbow Fish. It is my secret wish to author a book that wins a Caldecott medal. I have zero artistic talent, though, and I know I won't be winning any awards with AI-generated images. But perhaps someday I will be able to afford a professional illustrator or join forces with a traditional publisher stacked with resources, and then maybe I shall have my coveted prize!

For now, I'm doing my best with the resources available to me. My first two titles turned out great, and you can certainly see my improvement as an author and publisher when comparing the two. Neither tells a story, for they are juvenile nonfiction, meant as self-help for kids and inner children. The books are a healing journey for survivors of all ages who are recovering from abuse, trauma, or loss, pairing affirmations of hope and self-love with soothing scenes of childhood wonder and innocence to guide readers through their difficult emotions to a place of peace. 

Never Let Go is available as a free ebook from Barnes & Noble, Google Play, Apple Books, Everand, and many other online outlets or for $1.99 on Amazon. I hope to release print copies by the end of the summer to serve as a cheaper alternative to Wings for Your Heart, which is priced at $12.99 for paperback and $29.99 for hardcover due to its 80-page length. Originally intended as a deluxe edition, Wings expands upon and magnifies the message with twice as many illustrations and affirmations in a more visually immerse format. Wings for Your Heart is available now as a digital download on Amazon for $4.99 or free with a subscription to Kindle Unlimited, which offers a free 30-day trial. Paperback and hardcover copies go on sale at bookstores on 05/15/2025!

The project is very personal to me because a lot of my family members and close friends had traumatic experiences as children that continue to haunt them as adults. I personally endured physical and verbal abuse as a child, and as an adult, I've experienced SA and DV. I struggled with depression during my teens, primarily due to my mother's mental illness, and well into my twenties, during which time I was a single mother of two weathering the greatest recession since the Great Depression. I am diagnosed with PTSD, OCD, social anxiety, and bipolar disorder--although I suspect this is a misdiagnosis given how prevalent autism is in my family and I meet every diagnostic criteria in the DSM5. My family history is also rife with anxiety disorders, and my mother was bipolar with paranoid schizophrenia. Awareness and support for neurodivergence and trauma recovery are very important to me.

I think people shy away from discussing mental illness and trauma with kids, preferring to leave it to professionals like psychologists and school counselors, who were never much help to me, my children, my brothers--or anyone else in my family, really. Books saved me as a hurting kid who felt isolated and alone. Fiction was my preferred method of escapism, slipping into magical new worlds with feminist princesses and talking dragons. Those stories didn't heal the pain inside of me though. They only distracted me from it. Like many survivors, I was plagued by self-blame and poor self-esteem. I needed a lot of reassurance and validation that I was not getting from the world around me. I had to find it within myself, and it took many years. I really needed a book like this as a kid. Hell, I still need to hear these words as an adult sometimes.

It means a lot to me to share these words with others. I cried while writing them, and I'll probably shed more tears when I finally hold the books in my hands. I never thought I'd actually make it here. I really didn't. I wanted to and certainly believed I was capable, but it just seemed that life was determined to stand in my way and derail every plan. Now here I am. I am a writer. I am a children's book author. I have become who I set out to be. Even if I achieve nothing else in my whole life, if my light burns out tomorrow, I will still have left something behind, this one thing, my love letter to the world, to the children within us all. You really can do anything if you work hard enough long enough. We are magical beings with divine power in every heart.